BALANCING ACT

Do you pick a word for the year ahead – a word that captures what you feel you most need to give to yourself, focus on, or set your intentions around?

I do, and for 2020 I chose the word Balance.

Being an artist today seems to be about so much more than just making art. There are so many other things a working artists must attend to, which can take up a lot of our creative energy. Moving constantly between many roles is the new normal – artist, curator, promoter, writer, photographer, social media expert, fundraiser, shipper, administrator.

Don’t get me wrong. I recognize and appreciate the inherent value of the broader, accessible audience through social media and online platforms. And that also comes with its time demands and neediness. Sometimes I find myself just wanting to make art. After all, without the art, there isn’t anything to build a business around.

My art needs me and I need it. I have to – and want to – regularly spend time with it, nurture it and open up an internal space for it. 

The needs of making my art often run right up against the needs of promoting and supporting my art, which inherently takes away from the quality time I get to spend with myself cultivating an inner space from which to create. I find myself feeling like I need to fight for that space – becoming protective and obsessed. This, along with the need to move between the paradoxical mindsets that these various roles require, can leave me juggling a lot and seeking some balance in it all.

Recently, I’ve been thinking about my artist identity and these various, accompanying roles – what it means to have a presence online, a role in the art community, a reputation as a creativity coach, as well as attempting to be a productive, collectable and interesting artist all at the same time. It has pushed me to consider what’s necessary when it comes to sustaining a deeper relationship with myself, which, I believe, is absolutely needed in order to make our most personal and authentic art.  

It’s always about balance.

Who am I now and what do I need? That question is ever present and persistent – and one that brings about some good exploration, helping me navigate the paradoxes of being a working artist and coach.

In many ways I seem to like the variety of roles I play, and in other ways I find it challenging. At times I can lose touch with my truth and my passion and have it replaced with routine, habits and maintenance. I can get bogged down and lacklustre about it all if I’m not aware and don’t do something about it. We artists need to replenish and fill our creative well.

It's only by asking myself the right questions that I can coach myself back into alignment with my desires and get back to what's important to me – the work and my relationship with it. This engagement with reflective writing and questioning, and the connections that come as a result, might be the most important work that I can do to balance these conflicting needs. It helps me to know and sense the quality of my energy so I can make a good decision when I have to make a choice about where to spend my time. What would serve me best right now? How can I transition more fluidly between these various parts of myself with ease and find the artistry in all of it? 

It's through this introspective look at my roles, and how they are aligning with my greater purpose, that helps me access my truth. With that awareness I can guide myself to where I need to push and grow, as well as where I need to find balance. 

The power of good questions always helps me at these times. So I ask myself, what do I need to give more space to right now? And, what can I do to regenerate my creative energy so I can return to art-making with a fresh mindset?

The answers are always a welcome gift.